And be exactly who you are meant to be. . .
I am really good at giving advice to others and practicing as some sort of life coach to empower whomever I can. But, when it comes to acting on what I preach, it seems to be harder than I’d anticipate.
For some people, you don't get your ish* together until a stranger, or someone else calls you out on your bluff. Unfortunately, I have fallen into that category from time to time.
It's not necessarily a bad thing, though. I want to tell you a quick story on what I experienced in the a few weeks ago for two weeks in a row at church and how/why it has me wanting to try a whole lot harder than I have been.
Because let's be real. We can always try harder.
Two weeks ago, I was in church and we were in the middle of praise and worship. As I was singing my heart to God, praying--yet completely lost on what I really wanted to pray for, I felt a hand touch me and this person asked if they could pray for me.
When I say that I was balling real tears with the snotty nose and all after hearing what God called this man to do! His prayer was so on point and what I needed to hear. From telling me that I need to let go of my thoughts and come out of my shell. He told me that there was a yearning for him to come over to me and God pushed him to come to pray for me, even though I did not come up to the altar. After a few minutes of prayer and me crying, I was alone again. Asking God for help to fight through this person that I've allowed others to mold me into.
Isn't it something how, we experience life and engage with so many people during this lifetime that, sometimes we overlook the fact that we are being molded? I can vouch for this because, being in relationships, I know that I have personally tried to mold a man into what I want more than once.
Not too long after, another man approached me. This time, he was with a woman. I experienced this unexplainable feeling when this man prayed for me. It was as if the few moments before when I couldn't figure out what to pray to God about, it was now being addressed by this stranger. This man who I had never met in my life and God knew exactly how to use him. I am still a work in progress, but sometimes I can't do it on my own. I needed this man to remind me that who I have been thinking Saphia is, was now a person of the past.
This man told me that there is a worshipper within me that had been held back because of setbacks in my life, but that it is ready to be set free. He told me that I think too much and that the battle within my own mind is going to be healed by God. He said that there is a ministry over my life and that God will use me in different countries and in so many ways (Y'all know this had me hype inside). He said that my lack of an earthly father caused me to struggle with trust, but now it was causing me to seek more of God and that I should continue to seek Him.
This complete stranger told me that I am pained from the past and that I have been hurt and lost trust; that God is going to help me regain that trust. He prayed for me to be careful who I hang around because people will drain me (my last relationship literally drained me because I allowed it to) and also prayed for a new job and better relationships.
Now, this was all directed to me, of course. But it was a subtle reminder that we often overlook what God is doing inside of us and through us, because of the pain that we may feel even deeper.
I remember being told that I was too emotional and that I needed to be more logical. Originally, I was offended by the idea that someone could think emotions were such a problem. But now that I’ve had time to give the thought room to penetrate and find an area to sink into, I think it makes sense in this situation. Where we think that the situations in our life are breaking us, but that’s all triggered by what we feel, not thinking logically.
It was a reminder that we are worth so much more to God than we allow ourselves to believe.
You may be reading this and we have never met a day in life. Yet, my desired purpose is to encourage you and to remind you of your true greatness.
We live in a society that is steering everyone to behave or think a certain way in order to fit in. I hope that you know who you are, know your worth and understand that you have the choice to be your best self, according to you.