Let me set the scene: I decided to put my Calm app on at 11:00 pm. Figured it would give me time to fall asleep between then and 11:15 pm, at least, 7+ hours of sleep. My body aching, the lack of air in my room making it almost impossible for my body to catch the hint that my eyes have served their purpose for the day. Finally, I'm sleeping. I know this because I've reached the land of dreams and reality is no longer a reality. 3:57 am--" BOOM-BOOM-BRRRMMMM" I jumped out of my sleep. The impact was so intense and the sound was ringing through my eardrums as if it's echo was still performing. At first, I laid there. Staring out my window, waiting for a sequel. Light rain began to fall and I grew less worried and more content that it was just a thunderstorm--BOOOOOM! It happened again. This time, way more intense. I've never, in my 26 years of living and remembering, heard such strong thunder. The rain began to fall harder, lightning made its appearance, sirens roamed the street and stray dogs reminded previous owners that they still existed. In the 4:00 hour, I thought it was all over. Okay, I'm being dramatic, but so serious. My little sister had slept with me so she woke up also and I said to her, " I think Jesus is coming". She said "what!?" And I just went back to staring out the window and grabbed Ellie. (Ellie is my elephant that I got from Bronx zoo and can't sleep without )
It made me think. Of course, this wasn't the lead up to the rapture, but what if it had been. Would I be ready? Was I living the righteous life, or, at least, attempting to, that I should be living? Was I going up or being left behind? I distracted myself by looking up the cause of thunder. Maybe you know the scientific cause, but I've always disliked science so I saw it fit to research at 4:30 am. Plus, I was too afraid to go back to bed, but you didn't hear that from me.
After doing my research and filling my brain, reality hit me. Man, I began to repent and pray and fill my mind with happy thoughts, remind myself and God, just in case He forgot, that my heart has better intentions than my actions. I fear that as we get closer to witnessing this world under Corruption rather than "Under God", people will lose hope, lose faith, fall short of His glory. I'm afraid that when the time comes, too many people will never know what eternity feels like in the paradise that we so much desire.
Speaking for myself, I'm not perfect. It is constantly reiterated, especially on my blog. I'm like the Queen of messing up. I'm like Jack of all errors. I'm like Willy Wonka and the messed up factory. It's a part of my life. Most people that I know that aren't trying to live their lives to please God always think that you have to be perfect and that you live such a boring life. I personally love my life, to be honest. But I love what is to come after this earthly life and I want to do everything to achieve that, even if I have to struggle and mess up in between. Knowing the end result leaves more of an impact on your actions than freely traveling through the world with no direction.
In the midst of the crazy storm, I happened to have a dream too. I opened my bible as I was writing this blog and went into the concordance to see a verse on dreams. Ironically, it led me to Ecclesiastes 5. If you read this chapter, it speaks about making promises to God and not keeping them. So, I will leave you with this. In life, we can't always sense what our future holds. God judges us by our character. Your heart should remain pure and be refreshed every day and the need to promise God that you WILL do better tomorrow is futile. The moral of the story, God allowed me to see a glimpse of the second coming and I need to get my act together. Ha !
These are just the beginning of all that he does, merely a whisper of his power. Who, then, can comprehend the thunder of his power?” (Job 26:14 NLT)